June 06, 2012

best kept beauty secret

one of my favorite dresses...

chantilly block island 4

chantilly block island 2

oh yes, and also. today is my birthday.

i want to step out of the happy/ decadent theme of the week to discuss what this means to me a little bit, and possibly go off on a little feminist rant :P

you see, i've been having some anxiety about this birthday, as aging is such a big no-no for women in our culture. it doesn't matter that it's inevitable, or that everyone in the history of time has gotten old and died at some point. women must somehow learn how to stave off the physical effects of aging for as long as possible, in order to remain sexually desirable, and thus, have more value and bargaining power in society.

maybe living in nyc (home of beauty and shallowness) has made me overly sensitive to the topic. either way, subtly and not-so-subtly, people are told that the older a person gets (especially a woman), the less valuable they are. i once had a boss tell me that women "depreciate" as they get older. like a car. just one more person doing her part to make sure that younger generations would feel the fear of those ever-persistent birthdays just as much as she did. the way she still does.

but i had a revelation this weekend... and that revelation is that no matter how old i get, or how physically imperfect i am in the eyes of society, i really could give two big poops about it.

#1) it's all lies, and #2) all that matters- ALL that matters is love.

i'm not even talking about romantic love... but universal love. i think that no matter what kind of "imperfection" someone has, if they have a loving spirit, it shines through brighter than any other physical quality. when your spirit is fed, it makes you radiant. it's how everyone starts out. life will try to erode it away. never, never, never let that happen.

it might be corny, but i believe love is the best kept beauty secret.

and despite all the messages telling me i should be ashamed of myself for daring to stay alive one more year in this world... i kinda think i've never been hotter :)

and that is that.

happy birthday to me :)

chantilly block island 1


♥ listen to my new record on bandcamp

♥ see me perform at my cd release party!! pete's candy store, brooklyn ny/ june 16th/ 9pm ♥


  1. Happy Birthday! May you shine bright today and every day! :)

  2. Happy birthday :)

    u didnt mention which age? is that the secret? hehe does it matter?

    i love this post, and what you've said. smiles win through, love and sharing. keep the love alive.

    Barnicles x

  3. Happy birthday! It's so infuriating that aging has such double standards for men and women - while women 'depreciate' as your boss so charmingly put it, men are usually considered to get better with age. It's such a shallow way of looking at the world and hopefully one that a lot of people are beginning to rise above - I love your philosophy!
    Faye x

  4. Have an amazing birthday! Your boss was so so so wrong. People get better with age, like wine. Every physical change and shift is just proof of living, and what's better than living? (Um, like, nothing. Except chocolate cake, probably)

    Also I love the colors on your dress. Very happy looking!

  5. Yay, go you! Totally agree! ;) And HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! :D You are a beautiful person inside out; I'm so happy to have met you!

    Tight hugs!

  6. happy birthday!!! i love your dress and this post. honestly, the prettiest people i know are also the nicest. :)
    And you my friend, are lovely. :)

  7. So true! Good on you for you putting this out there. I have friends freaking out about turning 20 and I just can't get over it!! Perhaps I'll show them this post :)

    Happy birthday!! I hope you have a wonderful today :) Rhi xx

    The Wildest of Dreams

  8. Happy Birthday girl! Hope it's a great day! And this post was brilliant!

  9. Happy Birthday!! Have a wonderful day and thanks for this awesome post! xxx

  10. yesss. you nailed it. that's what it's all about. sifting through all of these socially constructed lies. and loving like there's no tomorrow. here's to another beautiful year, missy.

  11. A happy, beautiful, and joyous day to someone who has the most lovely spirit. :) Also, your leggies are as cute as buttons. I am glad that there are others out there that feel as I do. Have an awesome day!

  12. Happy birthday! I really enjoyed your post and you look stunning here.

  13. Sing it, sista!!! And happiest of all happy birthdays. You're always an inspiration, and I hope this year is better than the last. <3<3

  14. Hell yeah!! So true!!! And HAPPY BIRYHDAY!!!

  15. Pretty little dress! Hope you have an amazing birthday!

  16. yeahhh!!!!!:D you are totally right and you look amazing!!!
    Happy birthday !!!!

  17. Age only makes us more wonderful. Happy Birthday! :)

  18. Happy Birthday to you gemini Chantilly. Lovely post :). I think I am improving with age. Like you say, the most important thing is universal love. The older I get, the wiser I am and the more I focus on being the best 'me' I can be.

  19. Happy birthday beautiful and talented woman!
    Love is my favorite beauty secret too!
    Women get stronger with age. I think the only reason we are ever made to feel that we 'depreciate' is because our strength is a force to be reckoned with!
    May you roar a little louder this year :)

  20. i wholeheartedly agree! happy birthday!

  21. Happy Birthday Pretty Lady!!!

  22. Yay happy belated birthday to you! :)
    I agree on everything you write above about getting older! Screw them who say getting older is bad! Don't let such stupid comments get you down, you're beautiful! :)

  23. I totally agree.
    Happy Birthday!

  24. I'm a little late but happy birthday lovely lady! Here's to many more fabulous ones!

  25. HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHANTILLY!! So sorry I'm a day late on blog reading but I hope you have an amazing birthday WEEK! I know what you mean girl, weird how society makes you feel about aging. I never thought I would care but as my 30s are ticking away I kinda freak out sometimes ;) You are such a beaut and an amazing/inspiring/talented woman!

  26. First of all: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! (belated, that is.) <3 <3 <3

    Second of all, I completely agree! As long as we are loved and love back that's all that matters. <3

    Now that I think of it, that's probably why women fear aging so much. If we depreciate, and become less valuable, we'll be loved less. And I really think that wanting to be loved is such a big part of all women. I really think we're made to want so very badly to be loved.

    But I know that a sweet, beautiful girl like you will always be special, important, and loved no matter how old you get. <3

    Happy birthday, Chantilly! <3

  27. Happy Birthday.. I agree.. love, happiness and confidence. They make you radiate.


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