February 05, 2014
Coffee Talk ~ Self Image and Blogging
Some days, you got it and you know it.
Here are a few of my "I got it" days in the past few months.
The world is great. Feeling good. Feeling fine. Lookin' fine. Happy and secure. Loving life, and it shows... even if you're not smiling. It might go without saying, but these are the best days to take any type of photos of yourself.
But sometimes, the photo-taking days do not perfectly align with the feeling-great days. There are in fact, entire weeks where I completely forget how to say "I got it" to myself, and it sucks.
Frequent complaints: It's the winter. It's too cold. I've been eating too much. My eyes feel puffy, because I have insomnia... staying up all night long doing nothing in particular of value. I'm bothered by the lines on my face. I've got a fresh zit on my cheek. But worst of all... I just can't stop the negative thought stream!!
The last one is my downfall. Because we all know that all that other stuff can suck a big one, when compared to the sexiest thing in the world: CONFIDENCE. When you are constantly repeating negative mantras in your head, you are not going to sound good (hence, all the complaining...) feel good, OR look good. And the worst part is knowing you are stuck, but not knowing how to break the repetition of negative thought.
Big admission of guilt: I feel pressure to look super young, and pretty, and skinny in all of the photos that I post here. Not only because that's what women are "supposed" to do and be in our culture, but also in order to "keep up with the Joneses", if you will. To be like the other girls and women I admire who bravely post their photos online for the world to see and critique, and who look AWESOME doing it.
Maybe I'm shallow.
Maybe I'm a hypocrite for continuing to blog my outfits, even if I don't always feel "authentic" in doing so. I've never denied that. It is fun. It is a part of my life. I just needed to get this off my chest. I don't always feel perfect. I'm often insecure. Sometimes I have puffy eyes. Sometimes I have a broken heart. But I smile anyway. Smile, smile away... It's not always right. But it's what I do.
So now you know.
Labels: coffee talk
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