This post went up yesterday, but I actually meant for it to be scheduled for today... so sorry for the double-post!! xo
Happy day everyone!!
Have you all been staying cozy out there? The weather is turning cold here on the east coast... I've been bundling up in lots of layers, as well as nurturing a new fondness for huge sweaters and gigantic (GIGANTIC) scarves. I've also been doing lots of thinking about my
budding baby project, and have got
EP-makin' on the brain!
Saul and I have been doing a lot of communicating... he sends me new mixes, arrangements, and ideas as frequently as I can give him feedback about them. We have this Google doc that we continually populate with new information and thoughts about the way things are sounding. It's an exciting time, and I'm really happy about everything so far!!
But... I need to get something off of my chest- embarking on a collaborative creative endeavor with someone on an opposite coast is tricky... he is in LA. I am in New York. It feels a little clunky. He has a huge amount of control over things, and that's nerve-wracking for a nutball like me.
I keep thinking of handing over the keys to your intimate space to some rowdy, randy teenager... who's to say they won't have a massive party the second your back is turned and trash the place?? ... Now of course, I know he is doing right by the songs. He won't
really throw an epic kegger, spill beer all over the drapes, and puke on all the carpets. But still... imagine putting something
reallly important to you completely in someone else's hands.
So the control thing is an issue. But the
main thing is this- I'm not able to be present to shape the arrangements and overall feel of the songs. This makes me feel like I'm really just a
superfluous part of the process... of
my EP. He gets to do all the creative fun stuff, and I just sit back and sip my diet coke. Or coffee. Whatever.
I've been doing lots of thinking about all this... and I realize that
with everything that makes you uncomfortable, there's always a lesson.
I've always been a person who feels she has to do everything on her own. But really... that belief is just so limiting. I'm coming to realize that it is in fact, okay to receive help. Especially when I can't do something myself. I can't play drums. Or bass, or banjo, or harmonium. I don't know how to properly EQ vocals, and I couldn't tell you what proper mic placement for an acoustic guitar. But I got someone who knows how to do all those things! And he's doing them all for me! That's pretty cool.
In this instance, letting go of control of some creative content is the lesson to learn. I don't have to feel guilty that I'm not doing what I "should" be. That I'm not a
*real artist* if I don't have a hand in every single step of the process. It's just the way things are for this. And honestly... it's the way that a
lot of recordings are made.
In the end, they're my songs. It's my name on it. And I'm the one taking the risk.
Plus, I can't complain about
the results... they're stunning :)
Anyway, I don't know how much of this story you guys are going to relate to. I know most of you aren't out there making albums and recordings... and I really only meant to make this an update about the way things are going, not a soul-journey into the abyss of my fears. But... maybe some of you can understand/ or have your own epiphanies to share.
Learn any good life lessons lately? xxo
PS, very off-topic, but please check out this giveaway from my lovely sponsor Glitz and Love! They are giving away one of their magical pieces of jewelry to one of their Facebook fans :) xxo